NUFC 5 – 0 MUFC: Five goals, fifteen years, two dimensions

Fifteen years ago today, Newcastle United beat Manchester United by five goals to nil. It was class. My tribute comes in the form of five still images, each showing one of the five goals. Since my days doodling as a schoolboy I have tried to draw goals. By “goals” I mean acts of scoring in … Continue reading

One Too Many Managers

I recently posted a series of graphs showing the effects of changing manager on the battle against relegation among newly promoted teams. As a Newcastle fan and punishment glutton, I had no choice but to apply the same to the masterpiece in the field of managerial mess that was the Magpies’ 2008-09 season. The aim … Continue reading

I’m Sticking With You / After Promotion

It’s only the start of October and newly promoted teams QPR, Norwich and Swansea have already dropped thirteen points each. The directors of those clubs must surely be thinking about jettisoning their managers and bringing in new faces. Sure, Neil Warnock, Paul Lambert and Brendan Rodgers won promotion last season – but what have they … Continue reading

André Villas-Boas: a detailed visual analysis

See also: Robin van Persie

Quiz: Golaccio!

Cast your mind back to the mid 1990s: in Italy, Silvio Berlusconi is Prime Minister, the economy has been shaken by a recent recession and Alessandro Del Piero is finding the net for Juventus. You live in a world where live football of any kind is a rare event on terrestrial television and even Match … Continue reading

The Lion, the Bird and the Seahorse

Sick of season previews that go on about meaningless stuff like new signings, potential weaknesses and predicted positions? Below is a round up of the twenty 2011-12 Premier League teams in terms of something truly important: their crests. Whether you call them crests, logos, badges or blazing shields of defiance and optimism, they make up … Continue reading

The Peter Crouch Myth

It seems to be widely accepted as fact that Peter Crouch only scores goals for England when faced with weak opposition. Having never felt that this reputation was justified, I have investigated statistically and found startling results that show that he is an incredibly prolific and underrated international centre forward and will change the face … Continue reading

Top Flight Sixty-Four

There wasn’t a London team in the First Division of the Football League until its 17th season, I read. That’s interesting, I thought. Et cetera, et cetera and so on… I made this:

I Know Where the Scottish Title Goes

This diagram shows how novel each of the winners of the Scottish league was. For example Hearts’ title win in 1957-58 was very novel because it was their first since 1896-97. Rangers’ win in 2010-11 had very little novelty to it as they had won the league just the year before. There was an infinite … Continue reading

The Colours of the National Football Teams of the World

The map shows countries by the main colour of the home shirt of their national football team. Many countries, particularly in Africa and the Caribbean, have not settled on a particular colour (come on, guys; be a buddy!). In those cases, the most regularly used colour of recent years is shown. Click the image to … Continue reading